unrealistic "dating" - the introduction.

You've all seen those commercials. The ones that make you want to groan every time they come on. Yes, that's right.

Online dating commercials.

You see them and think, how could you be happy with someone you've met online? Personally I think it takes a lot away from meeting people. You judge someone by words they've written. By questions they answer that you probably wouldn't find the answers to for months in reality. There are very few walls with online dating. Maybe there is a comfort factor. What have you got to lose? It's not like you actually know this person.

This seems to be a new popular way of thinking. According to an article by social media guide Mashable, online dating is the new big internet fad. In fact, online dating is bigger than porn.

The statistics from that article are awing. 40 million Americans are online dating. That's a huge number. It's also worth mentioning that people lie on their online profiles. One in 10 are scammers; one in 10 are sex offenders. For every three women who go out on online-dating-inspired dates, one of those will have sex on the first date, and even more shocking, four of those five will not even use protection.

Online dating is like a fantasy world. You can meet people anywhere, if you choose. You could entertain the idea of visiting someone 3,000 miles away. You could think someone is "the one" (HA) and move for them. But what do you really know? People who meet via online dating websites typically get married years quicker than those couples who meet by what some may consider "natural" means. But really, what do you know about someone you meet online?!

I guess you have to trust that someone is going to be honest. And tell you truths about himself. You have to do this in all relationships, but it seems to me that some people lose a certain sense of reality when they enter the world of online dating.

But I'll tell you what - the real world is hard. I mean, really hard. If you would rather avoid meeting someone in a bar, and you have a full-time job, the amount of time and the places you can go to meet someone are few and far between. Being an adult is not like being in college. In college there are people around all the time. You can meet people who have similar interests. You can hang out with all your other friends. You have oodles of time on your hands because you don't have class 40 hours a week. It's easier in college.

So as someone who still considers herself new to the area, I'm not embarrassed to say that I'm trying online dating. I was skeptical going into it, and not much has changed, but I'm trying it.

I'll let you know how turns out.

lazy bones

I love technology. I really do. Like that song Kip sings at the end of Napoleon Dynamite:

I love technology
But not as much as you, you see
But I still love technology
Always and forever

I regress.

Despite loving technology, it is also a huge hassle. Everything revolves around technology, and without it, we are usually lost. Facebook or Twitter goes down, and everyone who uses those social medias panics. We forget our cell phones, and we feel naked. Various chat clients allow us to stay in touch, we can keep track of our schedule on Google Calendar, and we now can read books on an electronic reader.

What would life be like without all of these fancy gadgets?

We would have to go to the post office, buy stamps, and actually write out letters to friends.
We would have to pick up the phone and call someone instead of instant messaging or texting.
We would support our public libraries and understand how influential books and newspapers are.

Now I realize that these things have evolved over time. Back in 1775, Ben Franklin was the Postmaster General and stamps hadn't been invented yet. Phones were not invented until 1876. People have always had a love/hate relationship with books (book burning, anyone?).

But let's face it. Technology has made us lazy.

Now, if you want to buy anything, you can do it online. Groceries, clothes, electronics - all available online. You can put your library books on hold online. You can watch TV online, make phone calls online, and check into your flight online. But I'll tell you, these things don't really bother me. I like having so many resources at my fingertips. I've expressed to you before that I'm not so patient.

The thing that really gets me is this new iPhone commercial. Have you seen it? Here:


This commercial is the epitome of showing us how technology has made us lazy. If you are going on a trip, why would you not turn the lights off before you left your house? If you are going to be gone for a while, would you not double-check that lights and/or appliances are off before you leave? I would think you would. And your kids are going to watch a movie on your phone? What happened to coloring books, or writing stories? Or reading a book?! And yes, I mean a real book, not an electronic version.

Maybe lazy is the wrong word. Sometimes I feel like technology is taking all the brain work out of living. What are we learning from using apps that "make life easier" for us? We're not learning patience, how to actually calculate a tip, or how to really socialize with others.

So here is my challenge to you: don't let technology take the learning out of living. I know things have evolved for a reason, but it's important to get up from your desk to talk to another person once in a while. It's okay to call me - I like phone calls. Wait in line. Take a deep breath. Go to the grocery store. The library. Say hello to someone. Interact with something besides an electronic device.

I'm not saying give up technology. In some ways, I love it - I can stay connected to those far away from me and brush up on my useless trivia or the impending winter storm. I'm just suggesting that we stay human amidst the computer screens and smartphones. Your heart and your head still have a lot to learn beyond a screen - don't lose sight of reality.

an ode to the fruit fly.

Dear all you little fruit flies here,
You're always flying around me
Past my eyes and by my ears
When outside is where you should be.
You are a pest and I will not stand
To let any of you float around much more
So I continue to swat you away.
Do you not know that when I'm home and
You're around, I want to shoo you out the door?
But you will not go - you stay.

Fruit flies will follow you all through your day -
In the kitchen or the bathroom or even as far as your job
And they'll fly around you in a pesky way
Which could be enough to make you sob.
So little fruit flies please beware
I only have so much more patience for you.
Bugs of any kind are gross, I must admit
But fruit flies are a pain. I'll stare
Them down and squash them, so quick they won't know who
And I'll get my peace at the end of the day when I'm home and want to sit.

Yeah, it's not that great, but hey, I never said I was the next Keats. And it really is an ode.