So today's not technically a holiday. Thursday is.
I like to stay in the holiday spirit as long as possible. Though I have complained in the past about how Christmas keeps creeping into stores earlier each year, this year, I embraced it. I have had my big new tree set up in my apartment for about three weeks already.
Even though my tree has been up for a while, I only had two ornaments on it until today, when my mom had the chance to send me some of my childhood ornaments. I think now I have a grand total of ten ornaments (which isn't many considering that my tree is over six feet tall). And I felt sad hanging some of those ornaments.
I think part of it is that it's just nostalgic to hang up some of the ornaments. My grandma gave me an ornament every year, and now that she's gone I can't help but feel a little sad when I am hanging up something like the bear that I got in 1988. I'll always keep these ornaments, even if someday they spend all year in a box in favor of the ornaments my kids get from their grandparents. (Mom, stop crying).
But what was really sad to me was hanging those ornaments up alone. I remember when it was a family affair, and there were stories and favorites in those old boxes. Some of the ornaments my brother and I made, and as ugly as they might be, they still made it on the tree. Even some bulbs that didn't have a story would make the cut, and you could see them through the window, from the road. It's hard to share a story when you're by yourself, especially when you already know the stories.
Luckily I'll be home for Christmas. It's Thanksgiving this year that I'll miss. The smell of homemade baked beans, a huge turkey (and the electric knife!) and all those leftovers...not to mention a picnic table in the dining room. Thanksgiving is important, because we take time to think about the things we have in life that we are thankful for, when we usually don't sit and reflect on those things on a normal day. It's cliche, but we often lose sight of how lucky we really are to be given so many of our opportunites.
It's hard to know that I won't be at home this Thanksgiving, but I suppose that's just another part of growing up. We live with our parents and have family Thanksgiving dinners, and then we move away and make Thanksgiving dinners of our own.Weird, I know, but so is Santa knocking on your living room window on a Thanksgiving when you were five. We use all these experiences to grow and make our own traditions, even if we don't welcome that challenge at the time. We have to experience new things, like making turkeys or pies, so that one day, we'll be able to host a Thanksgiving dinner that others look forward to, just like our parents did for us.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
i'm like, a sorority girl.
If you were to ask me what the single best decision was that I made in college, I would be quick to tell you:
I joined a sorority.
Some see this as a cliche college experience. I have heard it all.
"Sorority girls are snobby."
"Sorority girls are selective."
"Sorority girls pay for their friends."
"Sorority girls all look and act the same."
"Sorority girls are mean girls."
"Sorority girls only care about partying."
"Sorority girls are airheads."
And so on and so on.
I will defend my sisters to my death. The girls who came before me, and the girls who are currently in my chapter back at school who I haven't had the pleasure of meeting. They are all my sisters, and I can say that they do not fit into any of the above stereotypes (or anything I forgot). My sisters are beautiful, intelligent individuals. We may belong to one group, but we have always all had our own identity, our own thoughts.
We are not snobby or selective; in reality, we are probably the most diverse group you may ever meet. We absolutely did not pay for our friends, as our dues go towards putting on programs and supporting our philanthropies, ensuring that we will continue to exist on our campus. (My favorite retort to the "you pay for your friends" accusation is to say that if I'm paying for my friends, I'm still waiting on my check!) My sisters are not your idea of a typical cookie-cutter girl - some like sports, some like dressing up, some like cooking. They're usually not mean...at least, not any more mean than any other girl. And yes, we like to have a good time, but I actually know individuals who have not gone Greek who party just as much, if not more.
My sisters, you see, are some of my favorite people.
All of my college experiences, excluding my very first semester (before I joined my sorority), would have been drastically different without my sisters and my sorority experience. I would not have met over half the people I know. I would not have gotten the job I had while in college. I would not have gained valuable leadership skills that are carrying over into my professional adult life. I would not have met some of my very best friends.
This gushing is not to imply that I didn't ever feel stressed about my sorority. I spent countless hours attending meetings or Greek Week events (Mock Rock practices!) when I could have been studying or sleeping. I dreamed of holding a position that went to someone else after I didn't receive enough votes (which actually turned out alright as I took on another role). I stressed about our finances as the Director of Finance. I worried and cried many times over the hardships that not only had an impact on my sisters, but on me.
Still, the best decision I ever made.
Now, 1,200 miles away from my sisters (give or take), I miss them every day. I miss having someone there to get food, or watch a movie, or just to complain to. I miss knowing that I would see these women every week, sometimes every day, even though at the time I grew tired of the commitment. I miss getting five or six new shirts every semester, and I miss all those little moments that wouldn't even matter to anyone but those that were there. I miss them all.
So I joined a new group, and went to the first meeting today. It's an alumna group, all of different sorority women. Some of them are from sororities I have never heard of, and most are actually quite a bit older than me (like, old enough to be my grandmother). But as I sat in this meeting, there was a sense of comaraderie that I hadn't felt since I last attended one of my own sorority meetings. It was a little different, since they weren't my sisters, but at some announcements, I felt like I should snap. I felt like there should be time limits on discussions. I felt the urge to pay dues.
Sisters, you might not realize it now, but your time in college, as an active sorority member, will probably some of the best times you'll ever have. Being an adult is fun, but it's not the same when you're not sneaking over to a fraternity house in the middle of the night and spray painting their rock. It's not the same as having a house that belongs to you and 60 other women. You'll never meet a more understanding, caring group than the sisters that will keep you company during philanthropic fundraisers, or homecoming spirit events, or weekly Sunday meetings.
Embrace it. You might not think so now, but it is probably the best decision you've ever made.
I joined a sorority.
Some see this as a cliche college experience. I have heard it all.
"Sorority girls are snobby."
"Sorority girls are selective."
"Sorority girls pay for their friends."
"Sorority girls all look and act the same."
"Sorority girls are mean girls."
"Sorority girls only care about partying."
"Sorority girls are airheads."
And so on and so on.
I will defend my sisters to my death. The girls who came before me, and the girls who are currently in my chapter back at school who I haven't had the pleasure of meeting. They are all my sisters, and I can say that they do not fit into any of the above stereotypes (or anything I forgot). My sisters are beautiful, intelligent individuals. We may belong to one group, but we have always all had our own identity, our own thoughts.
We are not snobby or selective; in reality, we are probably the most diverse group you may ever meet. We absolutely did not pay for our friends, as our dues go towards putting on programs and supporting our philanthropies, ensuring that we will continue to exist on our campus. (My favorite retort to the "you pay for your friends" accusation is to say that if I'm paying for my friends, I'm still waiting on my check!) My sisters are not your idea of a typical cookie-cutter girl - some like sports, some like dressing up, some like cooking. They're usually not mean...at least, not any more mean than any other girl. And yes, we like to have a good time, but I actually know individuals who have not gone Greek who party just as much, if not more.
My sisters, you see, are some of my favorite people.
All of my college experiences, excluding my very first semester (before I joined my sorority), would have been drastically different without my sisters and my sorority experience. I would not have met over half the people I know. I would not have gotten the job I had while in college. I would not have gained valuable leadership skills that are carrying over into my professional adult life. I would not have met some of my very best friends.
This gushing is not to imply that I didn't ever feel stressed about my sorority. I spent countless hours attending meetings or Greek Week events (Mock Rock practices!) when I could have been studying or sleeping. I dreamed of holding a position that went to someone else after I didn't receive enough votes (which actually turned out alright as I took on another role). I stressed about our finances as the Director of Finance. I worried and cried many times over the hardships that not only had an impact on my sisters, but on me.
Still, the best decision I ever made.
Now, 1,200 miles away from my sisters (give or take), I miss them every day. I miss having someone there to get food, or watch a movie, or just to complain to. I miss knowing that I would see these women every week, sometimes every day, even though at the time I grew tired of the commitment. I miss getting five or six new shirts every semester, and I miss all those little moments that wouldn't even matter to anyone but those that were there. I miss them all.
So I joined a new group, and went to the first meeting today. It's an alumna group, all of different sorority women. Some of them are from sororities I have never heard of, and most are actually quite a bit older than me (like, old enough to be my grandmother). But as I sat in this meeting, there was a sense of comaraderie that I hadn't felt since I last attended one of my own sorority meetings. It was a little different, since they weren't my sisters, but at some announcements, I felt like I should snap. I felt like there should be time limits on discussions. I felt the urge to pay dues.
Sisters, you might not realize it now, but your time in college, as an active sorority member, will probably some of the best times you'll ever have. Being an adult is fun, but it's not the same when you're not sneaking over to a fraternity house in the middle of the night and spray painting their rock. It's not the same as having a house that belongs to you and 60 other women. You'll never meet a more understanding, caring group than the sisters that will keep you company during philanthropic fundraisers, or homecoming spirit events, or weekly Sunday meetings.
Embrace it. You might not think so now, but it is probably the best decision you've ever made.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
the patient customer.
I will be the first one to admit that I am not patient. At all.
I am usually in a rush to get to my destination, whether it's with a career or just back to my apartment after spending some time at the gym. My parents can vouch for the fact that I've been complaining about not having a stable "adult" life - something that clearly takes time. Rush rush rush.
As an impatient person, I dislike it when people are in my way, either figuratively or literally. I hate waiting in lines. I hate waiting for mail, an email or a phone call. Maybe this can be traced back to being part of Generation Y. We're an instant generation. You can do anything online and it'll be done in a snap. I know that I can reach my mom with a phone call, a text or an instant message. Our generation is not expected to be patient about much, and while I know that I fall into a catagory of young people who need to get a grip and slow down, I simply can't help it. I want what I want when I want it...which was probably five minutes ago.
Recently I did learn a lesson or two in patience. Nothing huge, but something like waiting in line behind some out-of-towners at a restaurant. I waited, I was patient, and the man working the register gave me a free drink. You're probably thinking, "Who cares?! It's a $1.50 you would have spent if you had paid for the drink yourself." In reality, it's just the principle of the thing.
Although it would be nice to get rewarded for your patience...
So what do you do when you try to practice patience, and you're ignored?
I have spent the last 10 months working strictly in a customer service-related position. I understand why people get upset about not receiving what they pay for and why they may contact you five or six or ten times for a correction on the year's ranking system. I get that. You do what you can to straighten out an issue, and if it isn't corrected the first time, you go back and try something different to make sure that the customer is satisfied.
Understanding how hard it can be to be on the employee's side of a customer service snafu, I've tried patience. When my utilities company contacted me to let me know that my gas meter is broken (an error which is actually costing them money, and saving me a few bucks a month), I agreed to be available during a 4 hour period on a Saturday afternoon. I sat around, waiting, and no one ever came. I was patient! I was even more understanding and patient today when I agreed to come home after work so that they could fix it today.
The moral of the story? Patience may be a virtue, but honestly, sometimes I don't see what's so great about it. Sure, you can only go so far so fast before someone stops you and stands in your way. You can't make time move more quickly or your paycheck a bit larger to achieve the level of adulthood you know you'll reach...someday.
In a world where we rely so heavily on others for so many things, we need to be more understanding on both sides of the coin. I'll wait for you if you actually show up. I'll email you back if you just give me some time. And I'll wait behind you in line if I can get that free drink!
I swear I'll try to be patient, but I can't promise it'll be easy.
I am usually in a rush to get to my destination, whether it's with a career or just back to my apartment after spending some time at the gym. My parents can vouch for the fact that I've been complaining about not having a stable "adult" life - something that clearly takes time. Rush rush rush.
As an impatient person, I dislike it when people are in my way, either figuratively or literally. I hate waiting in lines. I hate waiting for mail, an email or a phone call. Maybe this can be traced back to being part of Generation Y. We're an instant generation. You can do anything online and it'll be done in a snap. I know that I can reach my mom with a phone call, a text or an instant message. Our generation is not expected to be patient about much, and while I know that I fall into a catagory of young people who need to get a grip and slow down, I simply can't help it. I want what I want when I want it...which was probably five minutes ago.
Recently I did learn a lesson or two in patience. Nothing huge, but something like waiting in line behind some out-of-towners at a restaurant. I waited, I was patient, and the man working the register gave me a free drink. You're probably thinking, "Who cares?! It's a $1.50 you would have spent if you had paid for the drink yourself." In reality, it's just the principle of the thing.
Although it would be nice to get rewarded for your patience...
So what do you do when you try to practice patience, and you're ignored?
I have spent the last 10 months working strictly in a customer service-related position. I understand why people get upset about not receiving what they pay for and why they may contact you five or six or ten times for a correction on the year's ranking system. I get that. You do what you can to straighten out an issue, and if it isn't corrected the first time, you go back and try something different to make sure that the customer is satisfied.
Understanding how hard it can be to be on the employee's side of a customer service snafu, I've tried patience. When my utilities company contacted me to let me know that my gas meter is broken (an error which is actually costing them money, and saving me a few bucks a month), I agreed to be available during a 4 hour period on a Saturday afternoon. I sat around, waiting, and no one ever came. I was patient! I was even more understanding and patient today when I agreed to come home after work so that they could fix it today.
The moral of the story? Patience may be a virtue, but honestly, sometimes I don't see what's so great about it. Sure, you can only go so far so fast before someone stops you and stands in your way. You can't make time move more quickly or your paycheck a bit larger to achieve the level of adulthood you know you'll reach...someday.
In a world where we rely so heavily on others for so many things, we need to be more understanding on both sides of the coin. I'll wait for you if you actually show up. I'll email you back if you just give me some time. And I'll wait behind you in line if I can get that free drink!
I swear I'll try to be patient, but I can't promise it'll be easy.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...
Believe it or not, I have always had a hard time with change.
I don't mean small changes. It's the big, monumental changes that make me nervous, sad and unsure.
This actually is probably normal. We know some changes are coming but that doesn't make it any easier to swallow. Even welcome changes, like graduating high school and going to college, or getting a degree and moving somewhere to take a job. Change can be a scary thing.
For one thing, it's hard to leave your family and friends. This is the first time in my entire life that I will not be having Thanksgiving dinner with my family. Not just my parents and my brother, but my aunts and uncles and cousins - people I don't get to see nearly enough. Sure, I'm going to attempt to have my own Thanksgiving, because you can be thankful no matter where you are, but it's just the heart of the matter. I want to see those people.
And it's great to make new friends, from all over, but there's just something about being near friends you've had for years. I haven't had my new friends for years yet. They don't know all my stories (which actually could be a good thing...), and they don't know some of my quirks like my old friends do. Even while making new friends, it's possible that your old friends can slip away from you. Friends I have from California or New York that I might not have spoken to or spent time with in years seem further away than the milage would suggest.
There's all sorts of new experiences we'll encounter in our lives: new cities, new houses, new cars, new family members. Currently I'm about to embark on another new thing: a new job.
I'm excited about the opportunties about to be presented to me with this new job. Writing and editing is something I have always had an interest in, but when in college, I chose to pursue other avenues. Now I can combine my interests with my skills and do something that is really going to challenge me.
But this is scary. I have already been told that there is going to be a lot expected of me. I guess I would hope so...since why would I want a job that didn't have high expectations? This is a new job with the organization I have been employed with for the last almost 11 months, and I feel like I have something to prove. I'm not just some average Suzy Hardworker who was offered the job - I know all these people. They know me, too, but only in a certain capacity. I don't want to disappoint them. I actually don't want to disappoint myself.
So really, no matter how challenging or scary a new opportunity is, we've got to put our best foot forward and stay focused on why it is we made that change. We can't stay in our parents house forever, in the same job we had when we were in college, no matter how comfortable it was or how well-liked we might have been. Changing is a challenge but we are better for it, and it's exciting, because you never can be sure what is ahead of you.
I don't mean small changes. It's the big, monumental changes that make me nervous, sad and unsure.
This actually is probably normal. We know some changes are coming but that doesn't make it any easier to swallow. Even welcome changes, like graduating high school and going to college, or getting a degree and moving somewhere to take a job. Change can be a scary thing.
For one thing, it's hard to leave your family and friends. This is the first time in my entire life that I will not be having Thanksgiving dinner with my family. Not just my parents and my brother, but my aunts and uncles and cousins - people I don't get to see nearly enough. Sure, I'm going to attempt to have my own Thanksgiving, because you can be thankful no matter where you are, but it's just the heart of the matter. I want to see those people.
And it's great to make new friends, from all over, but there's just something about being near friends you've had for years. I haven't had my new friends for years yet. They don't know all my stories (which actually could be a good thing...), and they don't know some of my quirks like my old friends do. Even while making new friends, it's possible that your old friends can slip away from you. Friends I have from California or New York that I might not have spoken to or spent time with in years seem further away than the milage would suggest.
There's all sorts of new experiences we'll encounter in our lives: new cities, new houses, new cars, new family members. Currently I'm about to embark on another new thing: a new job.
I'm excited about the opportunties about to be presented to me with this new job. Writing and editing is something I have always had an interest in, but when in college, I chose to pursue other avenues. Now I can combine my interests with my skills and do something that is really going to challenge me.
But this is scary. I have already been told that there is going to be a lot expected of me. I guess I would hope so...since why would I want a job that didn't have high expectations? This is a new job with the organization I have been employed with for the last almost 11 months, and I feel like I have something to prove. I'm not just some average Suzy Hardworker who was offered the job - I know all these people. They know me, too, but only in a certain capacity. I don't want to disappoint them. I actually don't want to disappoint myself.
So really, no matter how challenging or scary a new opportunity is, we've got to put our best foot forward and stay focused on why it is we made that change. We can't stay in our parents house forever, in the same job we had when we were in college, no matter how comfortable it was or how well-liked we might have been. Changing is a challenge but we are better for it, and it's exciting, because you never can be sure what is ahead of you.
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