I haven't written in a while. Which means I'm kind of being a bad blogger. Which makes me think of other things I am bad at. So I will share some of them with you.
1. I am bad at not talking about myself. Fitting, right? It's my blog-party and I'll say what I want to. I have noticed this recently, that most of my stories and conversations revolve around me and my friends and my mom and my my my me me me. I want to take this moment to say, I apologize for being a self-centered 25 year old. I don't mean to talk about myself, and because I have friends who really do make it all about them, I try not to be so me-centric. Please know that even when I am talking about me, I am also listening to you.
2. I am bad at eating what I'm supposed to be eating. That being said, I am great at eating foods that are bad for me. You remember that post I made last month, confessing that I was a hot mess when I finished college. I am an embarrassment sometimes. There is a reason it has taken me as long as it has to get down to where I am now, weight-wise. I like things that taste good and not always things that are good for me.
I eat my fair share of fruits and vegetables, but I am easily swayed by dinners out and beers and homemade tortilla chips from the local farmers market. I have more friends here than I ever have (after three years of living here, that's saying something), and when they want to do something, I don't turn them down. I have fun with my friends. But I also lose my self control and my plans for a healthy dinner.
I know it's my fault. I have tried Weight Watchers. It just doesn't work well for me. I want to eat nuts and avocados. (Don't say I could because I can fit them in with points. This argument is lost on me.) A friend of mine has had great success on WW this spring, after I suggested she try it with me. I quit. She didn't. I'm jealous that she's being successful, but I know it's my fault. I don't like the program, even though I know it works for so many. I have been on it numerous times (at least 5) and it has never worked for me, because I get too obsessive about what I'm eating and what I could be eating and I stop thinking about what I should be eating.
3. I'm bad at being proud of accomplishments. Yes, I have been running. A lot. My goal for this month was 30 miles, and with a whole week left, I'm less than 3 miles away from that. But yesterday I had a bad run, and I ate a falafel pita, and I had raspberry cider. It basically doesn't matter that I ran (if you can call it that), because I made poor choices. And I'm mad at myself about it. Just so you know.
And really, I should feel a little proud. I got a PR in my 5k on Saturday by 3:30. It felt good. It didn't hurt. Yet... I'm focused on the negative. So really I'm bad at making good choices and I'm also bad at being positive.
I don't want you to feel bad for me (OK, let's be honest, you probably don't anyway). Maybe I need you to be my drill sergeant and tell me to suck it up. Maybe I need a new brain so that I'm wired to do the things I need to do instead of the things I want to do. Maybe I need to stop reading blogs about people that have had their "a-ha!" moment (like here, here and here) and get around to having my own. You know, one that actually sticks.
Maybe this comes from this blog I read this morning (which you should read, because this guy is kind of my hero). It basically says not to be complacent. Make changes. Do something different. I worry I am complacent. I worry I'm just... settling. I'm not sure if I'm bad at being content or bad at finding what will make me happy. Guess I better work on figuring that out.
What are you bad at? What have you done to change your bad habits to become a better you?